Klowns in my Koffee

The topic today is awkwardness. As "awke" is Old Norse for wrong, the word literally means "in the wrong direction."

I had a mammogram today. It was awkward.

Anytime someone asks you to lift your chest up onto a shelf and hold still while a big weight presses it down, 'awkward' pretty much describes it. I was OK for the first round but then the technician thought that she could get some more of the skin from under my arms up on the plate. In terms of the skin tone of my arms and shoulders, apparently Madonna I'm not, since the tech managed to dig into where my lymph nodes had been happily living and somehow yank them forward, over and up.

Still, it didn't take very long, was uncomfortable only momentarily, and they gave me a bottle of cranberry juice. For a bunch of cookies, they probably could have pulled them out through my back and onto the plate. Good info on mammograms and breast cancer from the National Cancer Institute and the American Cancer Society. Want a reminder for yourself or someone you love to schedule a mammogram? Sign up with the American Cancer Society Health Messaging Assistant to receive an annual reminder. http://acsremindme.com/hma/modify_subscription.php?CID=288

Since I am 10 years and 10 repetitions of this test overdue per the American Cancer Society (or right on time per some cheap insurance companies), I'm a little concerned about the outcome. Making up for 11 years of missed health care was on my immediate post-layoff To-Do list and I am only a couple more tests from project completion. Don't want to die early from some completely preventable ailment because I was busy working on the Porkus plantation. Now that would be awkward.

And, speaking of awkward, I have been chuckling over this site since I came across it last week. For the first few pages, you'll think it's cute, but you'll find some pictures by about page 15 that might make tears roll down your face.

Awkward Family Photos